Time and Time Again

[Chibi Rachy]

The idea for this story came to me on my drive home from Fanchan's house. I was listening to my mp3 player and the song "Time and Time Again" by Chronic Future began to play, which reminded me of the music video. I got the strangest idea to do a story based on the music video for the song, not the lyrics. You can find the video here. I'd watch it to see the background if you wanted to truly understand where the inspiration came from. This story is a slight AU, and the note I post at the end explains why.


Time and Time Again

He stepped off the bus, his step slow and heavy. As the bus pulled away, he tossed off his red baseball cap, slamming it onto the ground. He’d just heard the news that he didn’t want hear. He’d been turned down, yet again by another scout and had to watch as yet another teammate received the scholarship instead.

We like your style, but it’s just not what our team needs. Sorry son.

Despite working hard and trying his best from a young age, he had never been the star player or even one of the more popular players on the team. He was simply an average guy with an average ability that could be found almost anywhere. He had been lucky to even make varsity for the high school team, and that had only been because RJ had been kicked off the team for drug use. He’d merely been the next one in line on the junior varsity squad, the oldest one on there too. Running his fingers through his sweaty brown locks, he looked to the sky, but saw nothing. What was the point of looking if nothing—or in this case, no one—was ever there?

Slowly, he walked across the field toward his home, kicking at his ball cap along the way. His book bag and gear bag were slung over his shoulder as he slowly trudged home, intent on locking himself in his room so that he didn’t have to tell his parents that he’d failed yet again. He was grateful that they hadn’t attended his game. His father had gotten stuck in a large court case, and his mother was taking care of his younger sister, who had a play group session during his game. Yet again, he played without a cheering section, which was fine by him, as he was only put in left field during the last inning because his team was so far ahead.

Of course, the scouts were there as always. He played his best and at the top of his game when a ball popped out his way and he caught it before it went over the fence, but it still wasn’t good enough. It never would be good enough to just be an average player. It wasn’t good enough to get him the scholarship he needed for college in the fall, and his parents had already put their foot down that they would not pay his way; he had to do it all on his own. He was never going to get an academic scholarship and now not even one for baseball.

As he reached his home, he quickly looked about for signs of his parents’ cars, and was relieved to see none. He unlocked the front door and let himself in, half expecting to hear the careful padding of dog’s paws, but then remembered that Sam had passed away last year. He didn’t even have his faithful companion to complain to anymore. He’d been and still was too devastated to get another dog. No one would ever replace Sam, the dog he’d had for fifteen years. He slammed the door to his bedroom and tossed his book bag to the floor, the heavy thump of books echoing off the hardwood floor. He’d deal with the homework later. Rummaging through his gear bag, he pulled out a wooden bat, a ball, and his fielder glove.

Down the stairs he headed, his goal the kitchen. There, he grabbed a few cookies and picked up the phone, dialing a number and waiting. He heard the voice on the other end of the line, and then spoke. “Hey, Conner. It’s me, Brian. Come over and let’s do a pick up game.” He continued making phone calls until he had enough for 3 on 3. Satisfied, he walked out the door and back to the nearby field.

For the new few hours, the only sounds heard were the ones of catching, hitting, and running. The boys played hard as the sun began to set, evening soon coming. Brian gave it his all, taking his anger out on the game. He ignored his mother’s call for dinner, opting to continue playing on. He just didn’t care. He ran the bases, his feet stomping onto each one as he passed it. He imagined each one a different scout that’d turned him down, that’d told him he was good, but not good enough.

He was jerked back to reality when his father’s yelling interrupted his satisfying imaginings. “Get home now, Brian! Your mother called you, and that means you come when you’re called. You don’t keep playing this damned silly game.”

Brian turned and looked at his father, glaring. “It’s not a silly game,” he replied icily.

His father pointed to the door. “Go. Now. And not another word from your mouth.”

Brian stomped off, which was the silent code to end the game. He was embarrassed that his friends had to see his father talk to him like that and he was angry that baseball was just some silly game. It was not a silly game to Brian. It was his life. Or it was until he discovered it was going to get him nowhere.

After a silent dinner, he left for the solace of his room. He slammed the door as hard as he could get away with and then fell onto his bed. His room was decked in baseball posters and memorabilia, including his own trophies from the time he began playing in his town’s youth league. He focused on the ceiling, letting his thoughts overtake him. His memories drifted from the present day back to that fateful day when he was ten… how easy life had been then. Baseball hadn’t been such a driving force to his future and he had so many choices and options from him.

He sighed as he remembered her, the happy, cheerful girl that had met him that first time he failed to make the town’s youth team. She spoke of hope and happiness and rainbows. Hope doesn’t come from a belt. It comes from inside us. Yeah right. What do you do when there’s nothing to hope for? When you’re at a loss? He remembered his times in that far off place, certain it was all some far flung dream of his imagination. Flying horses? Little girls with the power of a rainbow? If he would have told anyone, he would have been beaten. Boys didn’t talk of girls and rainbows. Ever since those few years, he’d never seen her again. She must have been a dream. A carefree dream, but a dream nevertheless.

Of course, if it was a dream, then the key was something he’d found. Over the years, it’d been lost. He had guessed his mother had tossed it out with her yearly yard sales and probably sold it for twenty-five cents. The key to getting to another world was probably sold off as some silly toy accessory, and no one would ever know its true purpose. Whatever happened to that girl, Rainbow, he had wondered. Never again had she come for him. Never had he seen her up in the clouds amongst the rainbow that would appear after a nice rainfall. She had just…disappeared from his life.

Brian’s thoughts were interrupted as his father opened the door without knocking and began yelling at him. Brian merely looked at him, not really listening to what was being said. It was all stuff he’d heard before. How he was a failure. How he’d never amount to anything. How he’d better do his homework because if he got a C again for the marking period, he was grounded without baseball. He wouldn’t even get to see a baseball. How the last marking period would affect his graduation, which no one would care about because he was ranked so low in his class to begin with. All the same stuff he’d heard before that he didn’t care to listen to. Pointless.

A few days later, his father handed him some pamphlets after dinner. Brian looked down at them, acting uninterested. He had no use for whatever was in them. They wouldn’t get him the scholarship he needed. “Don’t give me that look, Brian. You’ve got nothing else to do. Read them.”

“Fine,” was the terse reply as he shoved them aside to clear away the dinner plates.

After dinner, Brian grabbed the pamphlets off the table, ignoring whatever they said until he was away from his parents’ view. He entered his room and closed the door behind him, before tossing them onto his bed. He figured he had better look at them now because his father would not let up on it. He grabbed one at random and at once knew his father’s intentions.

“Of course,” he scoffed. “I should be what he couldn’t. I should do it and make something of myself. That’s what he wants.”

Brian flipped through the pamphlets, reading about being recruited and signing up to join the army. He looked over the statistics and the opportunities for college. He could work to earn the right to go to college. Without a scholarship, he’d never go. He’d never save enough money from a job around town to go to college. The army would give it to him if he enlisted. Then again, it’d be giving his father exactly what he wanted. His father had never been able to join the army. He had some problem or disability or something that they decided would affect his ability. So he’d been turned down and went to law school instead. Now, he wanted his son to follow in his footsteps.

Looking toward the door, he also knew that it’d get him away from here. He’d not have to deal with his parents nagging or yelling. There’d be no worrying about a lost baseball scholarship or what he’d have to find to do to make a living. It’d be set out for him. He’d be told exactly where to go and what to do. He’d earn the money he needed and then be able to go to school afterward. It wasn’t for long. Just one enlistment period and then he wouldn’t have to do it again. It was tempting… very tempting. Picking up one of the pamphlets, he read it as he walked down the hallway, past his parents’ room on his way to the kitchen. He glanced in and his eyes met his father’s.

“Consider it long and hard. I want a decision soon,” was the only thing his father said before going back to reading the newspaper. His mother only smiled and nodded at him before reading her book again. Brian only glared at them both before stomping off.

Graduation came and went. It was not a celebratory event for Brian. He graduated 57^th in a class of 98, and his parents didn’t care. He hadn’t made the grade enough to even graduate with dignity. They watched, stone-faced, as he received his diploma from the principal. There were no pictures, no smiles, no cheers. He was merely another male student in a blue cap and gown, graduating without honor and without scholarship. Another aimless, small town boy that was destined for failure.

Two days later, his parents drove him to the nearby suburb where the recruiting office was located. His father put his arm around him, looking proud. His mother cried silent tears for the boy she was going to lose. “You’ll do us good, boy,” said his father as he gave him a push forward.

Without looking back, Brian marched into the recruitment office. He turned his back on everything he knew, desperate to get out the only way he thought possible. He didn’t read through the paperwork, filling out the places the recruiter told him to. Before he knew it, he was on his way to being completely inducted into the United States Army. When he left the office that day, he looked to the sky, searching the clouds for something he knew he wouldn’t see. “There’s no hope left, no matter what you think. This is all I’ve got,” he whispered as he returned to his father’s car, where his parents were waiting for him.

~ 1 Year Later ~

He was camped out in the underbrush, somewhere deep in the jungle. He couldn’t remember how long they’d been here, or how long they would be here. He gazed forward, listening intently to the sounds around him. He was on watch duty, and kept an eye out for their enemy, a bit hard to do when they were able to conceal themselves in the jungle foliage. He waited and waited, as he did every day. Nothing interesting had ever happened on sentry duty. He’d seen his share of action and had been quick to see his buddies injured. So far, he’d managed to avoid being hurt and keeping out of trouble.

A light rain began to fall, and he glanced skyward. There wasn’t a rainfall that he wasn’t reminded of her, and her outlook on life. Each time there’d been a rainbow, he’d looked up, watching for her to suddenly appear upon that horse of hers, cheerful and happy as ever. Some nights he would dream of it, and she’d take him away from the hell hole he was stuck in. It all seemed a mistake now to have joined the army because of his father’s nagging. His father wasn’t busting his ass each day to survive. His father didn’t have to sleep in the mud or slog through the humid days. No, his father was stuck safely back home, tucked away in his little office with all the meaningless court cases while his son risked his life.

He remembered the day they’d been dropped into this zone, with nothing but the standard gear they carried on their backs. He had no idea what to expect, but put on a face to show that he didn’t care, that he was here to serve his country and nothing more. He remembered that first night, and remembered it very well. There was an ambush that night and 1/6 of the men had been injured or killed off the bat. They’d dug in, and taken care of business. Now, things like that seemed common, just as getting bitten by the strange assortment of bugs in this location was. All standard procedure. Nothing new, nothing out of the ordinary.

Lost in his daydreaming, he didn’t hear the emergency bird whistle that signaled a coming ambush. Nor did he see the command to move out and away. The next thing he knew, there was a barrage of bullets heading in his direction. He quickly snapped to attention, his motions automatic. Scanning the area, he ran for cover, seeking the safety of a large leafy bush nearby. Too late he saw the makeshift grenade tossed in his direction. He heard the explosion, and then nothing more.

Sometime later, he slowly came to. He was laying on something soft, and felt a cool breeze blowing on his face. He opened his eyes slowly, squinting at the bright light that greeted him. Again, he tried, finding himself laying beneath a bright blue sky. His eyes darted about, quickly scanning the area around him. All he could see above him were big, puffy clouds. He sat up and then jumped to his feet, looking at his surroundings. What he saw confused him. He was home.

Quickly, Brian looked down at himself. He was dressed in his standard BDU’s, his gear upon his back. He couldn’t remember coming home, nor why he’d have all his gear from the jungle with him. What had happened to him? How did he end up here? Did he get off the bus and pass out? A loud barking noise brought him out of his thoughts and questions. Brian looked up and did a double take when he saw Sam running toward him, eager and happy, just as he had been as a young dog. He’d been much slower in his senior years, and very arthritic.

Brian knelt down with open arms and embraced his dog in amazement. He felt so real and warm, so very furry. Sam licked his face all over, happy to see him again. “Oh boy, I’ve missed you,” he whispered softly.

Rising to his feet, Brian began walking toward his home, keeping a searching eye out for any enemies while appearing distracted and unalert. He stopped short when he detected the rainbow that fell right into his path, each color visible and bright. This all seemed familiar to him somehow, but he couldn’t place it. He knew it was there, but it was just out of his reach. He turned when he heard a galloping noise behind him, drawing his rifle in automatic defense. The shock on his face was quite visible when he found himself faced with Rainbow Brite, sitting happily upon Starlite. She slid off his back and strode up to him, a smile playing on her face as she pointed to the sky. “Hey, why didn’t you look up at the rainbow?”

“I…what?” asked Brian, confused. He felt so tall compared to Rainbow. She barely came mid-thigh on him. He had to kneel down just so he felt more at her height.

“What are you talking about? Why are you here? Why am I here? Why am I not off in the jungle?”

Rainbow Brite sighed before shrugging her shoulders. “Boy, you’ve got more questions than colors!”

You got that right. though Brian to himself.

“Okay, I’m Rainbow Brite. And this is Twink. And—“

“Starlite, the magnificent horse, the glory of the galaxy.”

This is not answering my questions at all he thought with a sigh.

“You see, we’re from Rainbow Land—“

Brian cut Rainbow short. “I know that. I know who you all are and where you’re from. I don’t know why you’re here or why I’m here.”

“Well, if you’d let me finish, I’d tell you,” replied Rainbow, still smiling cheerfully. “You see, we’re recruiting soldiers for a war, and we thought we’d ask you to join us,” she explained in a voice that was more like inviting him along for a picnic instead of joining in combat.

“Yeah, we need more recruits,” piped up Twink.

Brian could only watch as Rainbow spun around suddenly, before coming to a stop. Gone were her blue dress and rainbow colored moon boots. Instead, she wore BDU’s just like Brian’s her black, polished boots laced up tightly. She snapped to attention and spoke again. “I’m known as General Rainbow now and you, Brian, are just what I need.”

At this point, Brian was unsure of what to think. “Rainbow, there’s never a war in Rainbow Land. All you’ve got is Murky and Lurky.”

“Right. And they’ve got their own army now. He’s built himself a gloom army and they’ve attacked Rainbow Land. The Color Castle is a fortress of defense. All sprites have been called up for duty. It’s your turn to join us.”

Brian shook his head. “Rainbow, you’re crazy!”

Rainbow merely shook her head. “Tsk, tsk.” She turned smartly and swung up on Starlite. “We will fight until there is nothing left to fight for!” She pulled Twink up behind her, and Starlite took off, racing back up the rainbow.

Brian watched her for a few seconds, then began running after her. “Rainbow! No Rainbow wait!” His boots pounded into the ground as he raced up the rainbow, trying to catch up to her. “Stop! Wait!” he cried.

Rainbow never turned around, never looked back. When Brian looked down, he was shocked to see the rainbow fading beneath his feet while he was high in the sky. He sped up, trying to beat the fear that was beginning to eat at him. Soon, his foot found nothing solid to step on, and he began falling quickly. He tried reaching out. “Rainbow!” he yelled before his world once again went black.

The next thing Brian knew, he was coming to yet again. This time, he found himself blinking to adjust his eyes the bright light. He discovered himself staring at a stark white ceiling, and a quickly look around him showed that the room followed the same stark white pattern. He was hooked up to machines and tucked into bed. He tried to sit up, but was stopped by a voice.

“Hold it, soldier. I wouldn’t try that if I were you.”

Brian looked at the man in front of him, a decorated general by the looks of it. “You’re going home son. You fought bravely, but suffered injuries that will mostly heal. However, your left arm is paralyzed…” The general continued to speak, but Brian could not, or rather, would not listen to him. He tried to prove the general wrong. He tried to lift his right arm, tried his hardest, but he couldn’t. Nothing he did would make the limb move even a centimeter.

All of the exertion made him feel exhausted all of a sudden. He closed his eyes, easing himself into a dreamless sleep. He didn’t dream of Rainbow dressed as a general, or returning to the day they met. He merely slept and rested his body after a time of restlessness.

It was a few weeks later that Brian stood before an assembly in his hometown as he was awarded the Purple Heart. His parents stood in the front row. His father clapped loudly while his mother wiped at her eyes, both of them proud of his accomplishments. He had been given an honorable discharge from the military. He stood before those who’d seen him grow up and his parents, who had never been proud of anything he’d been able to do. All he’d ever been was average in his life. Now, he’d risked his life and suffered an irreversible fate and they were proud. That was what it had taken. He stood there, calm and collected as the reality of the world sunk in.

Returning home had been hard on Brian. Things just weren’t the same. He would stand in his room, silent, as he looked around at his trophies and awards. They spoke of a happier time, a simpler time. Nothing was ever so simple anymore. He would wander around the field near his home for hours, searching for something he could never find. He sat beneath the tree next to the old familiar dirt road. He stared into the distance, his right hand sifting through the dirt. Brian looked down suddenly as he felt something hard beneath his hand.

Quickly, he dug through the dirt until the glimpse of tarnished gold shown through the dirt. It can’t be! he thought to himself as he pulled the object from the dirt with a shaking hand. But it is…it really is! The rounded rainbow end left no doubt in his mind as to what it really was. It was his old key to Rainbow Land, the one that Rainbow had promised him would work in any lock in any door. He rose to his feet and began to walk toward his parents’ house at a slow pace, still amazed at what he’d found.

Brian never saw the rainbow appear in front of him, never even looked around to check for signs of an enemy as he had done ever since returning home. He merely walked into it, as he had done all those years ago as a ten year old boy. He looked around in shock as he felt the familiar warm and colorful feeling of being trapped in the rainbow. Knowing what it meant, he ran out of it, looking first at himself. He had never been so happy to have been covered in color. “I’m covered in color!” he said, in amazement, not shock.

The familiar galloping sound came next and he turned, coming face to face with an old, familiar friend. “Hey, why didn’t you look up at the rainbow?” she asked, pointing to the sky with a twinkle in her eye. He noticed that Twink and Starlite each said nothing, both silently watching the exchange between Rainbow and Brian.

She was unprepared, however, for what Brian did next. With all the strength he had in his right arm, he lifted her off the ground and hugged her tightly to him. Silent tears fell down his face as he embraced her. “Oh Rainbow,” he whispered. “It’s so good to see you again.” He set her back down on the ground and knelt to her level.

“I never forgot you Brian. It was you who forgot me. You thought I was a dream. I couldn’t reappear to you until you remembered what really happened.”

“I did… I thought of you when I was off in the jungle. I looked for you all the time whenever a rainbow appeared, but I never saw you.”

Rainbow smiled sadly and shook her head. “You looked too hard,” she began. “You never had to search the skies for me.” She raised her hand, and placed it over his heart. “All you ever had to do was look in here, and you would find me.”

Brian nodded, not needing to reply. A fleeting quote floated to the top of his mind. Hope doesn’t come from a belt. It comes from inside of us. He’d looked far and wide for Rainbow Brite on every rainbow, when he only would have had to use his heart, his soul and he would have once again found her.

Rainbow leaned up and kissed his rough cheek. “Come with me to Rainbow Land, and we’ll get those colors out of you.”

Brian smiled at her and nodded. “All right.” He rose to his feet and took the hand she offered him. He climbed aboard Starlite and this time it was he who pulled Rainbow up in front of him. He felt Twink hold on to him as Starlite galloped back up the rainbow, heading back to Rainbow Land.

“You’ve got a lot of catching up to do, Brian. A lot’s happened since you last came,” Rainbow called over her shoulder.

Brian didn’t mind. After all this time, he’d reconnected with his past, and felt that familiar feeling from all those years ago, one that had slowly disappeared as he’d lost faith in himself. He’d lost his faith and his hope. To feel the warmth of both envelop him was like coming home to an old friend. This time though, Brian would cherish them both, and vowed never to lose either of them. As long as he was true to himself, he’d always have a rainbow inside of him too.

I hope you enjoyed. The conflict Brian was involved in was one in Panama in the early 90's. However, that occurred the beginning of the year he turned 18 so the timeline is stretched and left very vague. Regardless, I hope you enjoyed. Let me know what you think.

[TheWendybird]

I really liked that...and it really touched me! I think it's great!

[Chibi Rachy]

Thank you I'm glad you liked it. It was such a fun story to write!